My wife went off the pill, our marriage died. Science?
June 22, 2012Apparently there is evidence that suggests your partner may lose the whole ‘till death do us part‘ feeling if she comes off the pill…
Who knew? My wife caught the rabies around the time she hit 34. A few months after our marriage she went of the pill to plan her cycle. It was a tumultuous time, the whole 2008 economic crash had just taken place, the big banks fucked up the world economy, she lost her job as a direct result of it, and the effects of the bailouts down south were having a direct impact on the company i worked for and it started downsizing and cutting worker pay. I was barely hanging onto my job. This was not the time to try to have kids. Eventually my job tanked as well. She eventually landed a job that paid very well but had a brutal work schedule and i was going through a depression at my lack of work options. I told myself this:
I am NOT going to take the first menial shit job that comes along slaving away in a factory or some other mule-for-hire employment simply to bring home a paycheck so we can squeeze out a kid. Not under these conditions no way no how. It would start us down a path that we would both regret.
Turns out that path was already set upon. My finickiness over my future career (even tho i helped pay off her student debts and helped pay for her continuing education, see Briffault’s Law) and inability to find meaningful work started the ball rolling towards ‘unhaaaaapyland‘. Within 5 months we were in counseling, 2 months later our marriage was in the E.R. flat-lined with a do not resuscitate order in place.
I, ____, take you, ____, to be my lawfully wedded(husband/wife),
to have and to hold, from this day forward,
for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer,
in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
Keeping couples together since 1963
I can only imagine what things might have been had she stayed on the pill? I’ll never know… but damn.
M3 
I don’t understand the point: Does the Pill keeps her more attached and loving to you or the opposite?
It wasn’t the pill, it was your drop in income and that she wanted a kid. If you made enough to keep her fat and preggers is what you should be imagining. You are fine, it’s her hypergamy that caused the break-up. You learned what it took me 27 years of marriage to learn–bitches will ditch you at the first sign of trouble.
Science is showing that women’s attraction to men changes between them being on the pill vs. off the pill. So if you meet a woman who fancies you while she’s on the pill, as soon as she stops taking it, she might not feel the same way about you anymore. I’m not sure if it goes the same way if she’s not on the pill and then starts the pill = same results but i can’t imagine it not being the case.
Moral of the story.. keep putting birth control pills in her drinks if she goes off them LOL.
27 years.. my condolences, that’s harsh.
And men are the commitmentphobes. In my life i have not ONCE encountered a man who left his wife or ended his marriage by giving up on trying to save it. The whole ‘men won’t commit’ meme is women applying it to the start of one of their serial monogamy relationships, not actual marriage. If it gets to marriage, it ain’t men who are the phobes.
My simplistic theory as to why this is scientifically true: 1. wimmenz prefer alpha badboys during ovulation, but betas the rest of the time; 2) wimmenz on the pill never ovulate; 3) up your alpha game when she goes off pill or she will dump you.
Losing job definitely a no-no when she is looking to procreate. Women are cold and heartless.
I don’t think it was the pill that was the problem, it was her need to have a baby at an inappropriate time in your lives, and your losing your job. (Having said that, The Pill can really screw with a woman’s emotions, and women are already all over the place.)
I have seen women hang in there with men when they have lost everything. Do I think women might be inclined to bail on a man if he is no longer financially stable? Absolutely.
Actually they do ovulate sometimes, but the pill works as an abortifacient in the case of conception since it prevents implantation.
It is about hormones and not about women being cold and heartless. If you lost attraction for a women could you stay with her?
The hormones in BCP do trigger changes that are related to alpha versus beta males because post conception, your hormones change, making you more attracted to “family” (the familiar and known because it’s safe and reliable) and “beta” males fit that bill to ensure the offspring have the best chances of survival.
When I met my now husband I was not on the pill and the attraction was through roof. Then I got on the pill and my physical attraction for him waned but the depth of my attraction goes beyond the physical so it was fine.
To be clear, I was on the pill since the age of 16 but had gotten off it after my first marriage ended, so there was really only a six month or so period of time when I was not on the pill.
Now after being together almost 15 years I got off the pill again and physical attraction returned. 🙂
Hormones are nothing to mess with. The proof is that I am now an emotional basket case at 48 years old, when while on the pill I was rather emotion less. I was on the pill for 32 years total, I am like a whole different person now.