Is OKC fucking with my mind?
June 24, 2012Seriously. Like WTF? Am i on hallucinogenics?
Ok.. so i’m trying this shit again.. because my best friend told me i shouldn’t have any issue putting myself out there to look for a little fun now that i dropped all that toxic nonsense behind. LJBF my candy ass. So i nail up a profile that i think is vague and aloof enough, but containing enough words and subtle innuendo’s for the smarter ones to catch onto. Still i should be interacting on the streets and in the pubs, approach style like the sphere says i should. Yet i take the plunge into this morass just out of moribund curiosity to see if anything would be different that the last time when i was pathetically beta with a pathetic beta profile verklempt with all manner of inane professions of looking for ‘the one‘. Boy did my esteem take a hit way back when on Plenty of Attention Whor… Fish.
Are you the ‘One’?
So hows it going?
Well it’s still a shit show to be sure.
Whereas now i actually have had conversations with some of the women at a ratio of 10 sends to 1 reply, which certainly beat my previous ratio of 100 sends to 0 replies, there still seems to be an ongoing pattern and as of late.. something smells ‘fishy’ and we’re not talking about the plenty of variety here.
A great majority of the conversations are quick quips of back n forth minimalistic one liners loaded with humor, touch of innuendo and flirtation. They go about 5 messages long before i take it towards grabbing a drink and meeting at a venue. Then it’s poof, they vanish.. or flake .. or come up with an excuse as to why they can’t. I feel like i’m just feeding ego’s… even tho i’m not actually complimenting them unless it’s really subtle and not overt.
I’m actually having a great convo with what seems like an either really hilarious married chick, or a homicidal crazy, kill me with a shovel and bury me with it to type of woman. Flip a coin it’ll go either way. If this blog goes silent anytime soon, you’ll know.
But on at least 2 occasions.. the girl i started talking to because her pictures where hot.. all of a sudden 3 conversations in i go back to check her profile and it’s like SWEET HOLY MOTHER OF GOD pour some hand sanitizer into my eyes and burn down the fucking internet! WTF HAPPENED?
Now i generally do not go out of my way to make fun of anyone.. before i hit my p90x awesomeness and changed my lifestyle, look, attitude, inner game, etc.. i wasn’t anything special to look at.
So here’s my issue.
I drink.. but i don’t drink that fucking much. I don’t drink to the point where i’m cruising OKC at 2am picking out random profiles while the room is spinning and launch a message. I still have standards. My standards have always been high. Remarkably high. My friends tell me i’d be happier if i dropped them and banged a bigger girl. I tell them my dick is not capable of rising unless she meets a certain statuesque criteria. I’d rather be alone and rub one out solo than live the life of that stupid phrase ‘YOLO‘ and bang anything and everything. For me it’s quality not quantity. I only wish the quality body girls would also come with quality minds but it seems the 2 don’t mesh too well that often. My representative sample is small but there seems to be a correlation with hotness and absolute batshit crazy. I can’t put my finger on it, maybe someone can gimme some solid science behind this phenomenon.
But i’m going off track, as i usually do. It’s in my nature being a story teller and all, i love to embellish and take diverg… FUCK i did it again!
So here i am having a conversation with what i thought was a nice leggy blonde hottie from a few nights ago. I know for a fact i checked her profile pics out, that’s standard procedure for me. I’m shallow, deal with it. If you don’t make me stir in my nether regions, it’s D.O.A. So this conversation goes 4 messages strong back n forth. I’m loving it because it’s just working, and because another girl just dropped off the face of the internet as they so often do i thought well at least i got this one, maybe i can line her up for the weekend. Lemme go see what she looks like again. I know she’s a girly girl who like to wear skirts and heels, always a good thing, ok pulling up the photo tab here now and…
And I heard a great voice out of the temple saying to the seven angels, Go your ways, and pour out the vials of the wrath of God upon the earth.
Ok. That’s probably more hyperbole and hysteria than actuality but regardless, the pics i happened upon were not in any way the pics that i recalled from the same leggy blonde i spoke with 2 days prior. She had transformed, shape shifted, metastasized into something else. She looked like a feminist lesbian. I. Shit. You. Not.
Not an actual representation. But close enough.
Again, i’m not trying to be rude or an asshole here.. but facts are facts. The pics i was looking at would never have allowed me to even start up a conversation with her in the first place. So what’s the deal? Did she change them up overnight because i’m the first guy to show interest in her and she wants me to see the unvarnished truth? Or is there there a bamboozle switch in the matrix somewhere, where it shows good pics on profiles to ensnare you, and then revert them to ‘reality’ once your already talking to them.
I only ask because i KNOW i couldn’t have been that drunk. Can anyone else verify or corroborate what i’m saying here? I don’t want to feel like i’m going insane.
Beyond my better judgement, i’m still talking to her, but with the attempt to wean her off me.
I know i couldn’t have been that drunk.
I just couldn’t have.
Not me.
Someone is fucking with me.
Time to start trying bars again. At least there, the goods are viewable up front without the aid of Photoshop, although i’m sure false eyelashes come close.
M3 
From what I know of internet game – its for two people. The desperate and the 10’s in looks that for some reason can’t do day or night game. Or simply don’t have time to. Or travel.
So maybe a few types.
Regardless. You have a better physique than I do. Go out there and get some action, stop with the internet game.
Thanks Leap. I’m still working on breaking approach anxiety. Physique doesn’t do diddly without confidence to approach n stay ‘exciting’. Right now I’m doing dogsquats flirt with everyone routine, but mainly with customer service types. Need to level up to strangers.
No offense M3 but customer service types are “hired guns” and forced to be nice to you because it’s their job. The only way you’re going to conquer your fear is to face it and do it anyway.
Get into the mindset of “I don’t give a shit whatever her reaction is. I’m doing this to up my game for the next one.” i.e. whichever ‘one’ it is, keep it in your head that there is going to be another, better one standing in line.
Another thing that used to help me when I was single was thinking along the lines of, “I’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain. I’m not here to get lucky with this one, I’m here to hone my skills.” It’s a mind game and the only way to beat it is to do it irrespective of the outcome.
Thinking back now, I reckon the biggest catalyst of approach anxiety is the expectations you set before the approach. Get rid of the expectations and get yourself into the “I’m going to have fun and meet some chicks today no matter what.”
None taken. I’m shedding my beta slowly, baby steps. But ya, i need to dump the life preserver and learn to swim. Nothing to lose, all to gain.
Need to think about spinning plates instead of looking for that one piece of fine china.
Adding to your “looking for that one piece of fine china” analogy:
How do you expect yourself to recognize that piece of china if you haven’t dined off the rest of the plates? About that china – the chances are high that it will have just as many chips and cracks as the rest of the plates. 😉
lol. guess you gotta go through a lot of plates to figure out which ones are microwave and dishwasher safe…
One of the HUGEST helps to me were two things. The first was that whenever you’re walking around, clear your mind, and come up in your head with how you’d open someone. Use Rooshes ‘old person’ routines for a basis. It helps keep your mind quick so that when a girl does toss an IOI your way, you’re trained to instantly have something on hand.
The second was something I read at Badgers – game with people that aren’t even attractive during the day. Old women, cashiers, everyone. Flirting is 90% just being a nice person with something to talk about. The last 10% is escalation. So take out the escalation, and just chat every person up you come across.
You look pretty bad ass in that pic. If you could walk around town without a shirt you’d surely get some action with even a teen girl.
On Approach Anxiety, I recently read something in Danger&Play or similar, that compared some military challenges to that of approaching girls. It made ‘approaching that girl’ seem like a child’s game when compared to face another soldier in combat. Maybe that’s the clearest fact that could help anyone face AA.
Many thanks for the comp Pedro! If anything i like to think of myself as a walking endorsement for p90x. 1.5 years ago, you wouldn’t be saying what you did.
It’s too bad that me hanging around a high school would probably land me in hot water with the law.. but women can get moist over the poolboy or female teachers can molest their male students.. gotta love equality.
I’ll have to try your ‘mission’ approach towards approaching, makes sense. I think my underlying problem is that the majority of the time, my shirt stays on, and in that case, i need to ‘talk’ with women, and i find for the most part i have very little interest in the babble that interests them. Feigning interest is not my strong suit. Unless there’s a serious attraction, small talk isn’t within me. And the first thing a woman usually asks is ‘So what do you do for a living’ in which case i shut down because i feel like oh fuck here we go. My job doesn’t define me and you’re about to judge me by it, so i go into ‘gold-digger’ mode and crush her. Maybe i should just start lying and say i’m an actor and see what happens?
And the first thing a woman usually asks is ‘So what do you do for a living’ in which case i shut down
I suggest you change your mindset with that. The question is an IOI. If you don’t want to answer it take it as an opportunity to display your sense of humor. Make her work for the real answer by displaying your sense of humor. e.g.
W: So what do you do for a living?
M: I’m an astronaut.
W: No way, really?
M: Yeah, I’m on the team they’re sending to visit the sun to investigate the solar flares.
W: Bullshit.
M: OK then, what do you think I do then?
And take it from there.
Don’t see every question as a challenge. Lighten up and have some fun. Women like to dig, give them an opportunity to do that — they need to qualify themselves to get the answer.
e.g. 2:
W: So what do you do for a living?
M: Guess.
W: I’m not good at guessing, just tell me.
M: OK, I’ll give you a hint. In my job I’m always in the shit.
W: Huh?
M: You’re going to have to do better than that.
W: I have no idea, just tell me.
M: [chuckle] No. [pause] I’ll give you another hint. I’m the guy that responds whenever you’re in trouble at home. C’mon, don’t disappoint me now.
W: Police officer?
M: [shake your head] Try again.
W: I’m not playing this game.
M: I’m a plumber. Do your pipes need cleaning?
And take it from there.
– You’ve got to tease them and let them work for it.
– Not every question a woman asks deserves a straight answer.
Lol. Visit the sun! Pure gold. Thanks, i’m gonna def try those 2 for starters and tailor it from there. Thanks for the tips!
You’re welcome 🙂
When you change your mindset from “I need to get laid” to “I’m going to have some fun” the game changes. Women have an uncanny ability to sense neediness so you have to fly under their radar. The only way to do that is to really not be needy.
That’s the reason why the PUA’s abundance mentality helps. i.e. If you know that there are more out there you won’t be desperate to qualify the one in front of you. Keep in mind that you are a prize she needs to compete for.
This my or may not work for you, but I try and reward women that play along with these games with both the truth they get to and a little bit of the passions that drive me. If it’s work and my job, I’ll try and show her some of the passion I have for it. Or if she plays a guessing game with my age I’ll not only joke about any age differences, but also drop some bait/hints of my value for getting where I am by my age.
It helps make it so there’s less judgment on the answers because you own them and they’re a part of you. I get judged every time someone asks me my job because I’m in theatre, but in a set designer and not an actor. I work harder and get paid more, but it’s not the ‘mega high status’ position hamsters shit themselves for. But with some playful teasing and letting her see the passion of my art, I -can- pass those shit tests with flying colors unless she’s a super status whoring bitch. Calibrate for your lifestyle, personality, and the girl you’re talkin to