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Ladies.. Welcome to M3’s Used Car Emporium

February 5, 2013

Com’on down and let’s get your fine rear into a great vehicle today m’lady!

Don’t worry about any nasty car salesman tactics…

You can trust a face like this…

carsales1

Photoshop is my mistress. Welcome to M3’s Used Car Extravaganza!

I see you’re a little nervous miss. First time buying a car? Yeah, it can be exciting. I hear ya. You’re tired of renting and leasing vehicles, you want to own one for the long haul. A great dependable vehicle that will get you from A to B! One that’s reliable and won’t break down on you half way through your journey!

Well, i’m here to help.

And there’s NO need to consult with Car & Driver or Consumer Reports lil’missy. I’ll be your hookup.

So let’s start shall we! Follow me this way to the lot.

carsales2

This picture is years old and only time you’ll catch me in a purple suit jacket.

Ok, take a look at these two fine beauties!

2vettes

Ignore the oil slick under the red one.. that’s always been there.

Look at these two fine racers. Real byewt’s ain’t they? They’re both $42,500 dollars. A real steal!

What do you mean you want to look at the odometer? Those numbers don’t mean anything. You don’t need to see those.. wha? No, that’s not oil dripping down from the car.. that’s, umm.. oil bubbling up from under the ground. We’re on an oil field. It happens. Service history.. ummm. Err, wait a minute… just look at these cars.. they’re beautiful! You’re not going to worry about something as minor as what the previous owner did with this car are you? Or how many previous owners… that’s not important. What’s important is that either of these cars are fabulous and worth falling in love with. So just pick one and we can sign the paperwork right no….

Ok.. i’m hear’n ya. You don’t want a Vette. A’right.

2stangs

Wreckage? Salvage? What are these words? Sorcery and Witchcraft?

Now we’re talking. You want a pure stallion, a thoroughbred. A racing steed! I knew that the second you walked in. I got two in stock for ya.

Both go for $39,998 but i’ll lower it to $35,000 flat if you take one today. Uh, no i can’t really let you look into the service books there missy. Ummm, yeah, that’s a typo. I don’t know what “salvage” means…  are you sure? Well i’ll be damned.. one of them was written off as a “wrecked”. But jeez louise don’t they both look outstanding. Someone must’a done a gosh darned fine job putt’n the scrapped one back together. I mean LOOK AT’M! Identical. So.. you’re not gonna let a little insecurity about a word stop you from making a steal of a purchase today are ya? I mean it’s been rebuilt to the same build as the new one… wha? You want a deep discount on it? Why? I don’t plum understand why you think just because the car dang got rolled that it’s not as good as brand new.. *sigh*.. a’ight.. you’re a tough sell. Let’s try something more with an import flavour.

2minis

One of these has electrical fires, warning lights and a tendency to explode spontaneously.  Your insecurity is really starting to show…

Ok.. i guess by now you’re getting the point.

It’s why we read Car & Driver. It’s why we watch Motoring 2013. It’s why we love to watch Jeremy Clarkson on Top Gear. It’s because we want to know about trends, durability, reliability and what to look for statistically to avoid getting saddled with a lemon. It’s why we avoided KIA’s for the longest time until they got their act together. It’s why i always avoided FORD until they built the 2012 Focus line based off the global platform and not the Found On Road Dead North American platform.

The way **you** treat buying a car (or how you should) with caution is the same process we use when looking for someone to call wife or someone we ‘settle down’ with. If we’re going pay the high price of removing ourself from the mating landscape – especially IF we have options to play out, we want to make sure we’re getting good value for the money over the long haul of our investment.

AND WE DO OUR RESEARCH!

(or at least Alpha’s do. But that’s why we’re here.. to teach everyone else down the pipe not to simply accept a lemon as the best you can do!)

Yes, i have done something today that many will find obnoxious and downright offensive. Ask me if i have but one fuck to give and i shall tell you.

NO

I have compared your sexuality to that of a used vehicle. And every smart buyer knows to purchase a Used Vehicle Package prior to putting down his hard earned cash on a personal conveyance they wish to own for the life of the vehicle. And past ownership matters. Let’s break it down using everyone’s favourite and dependable car: The Honda Civic.

You pay full price before you get inside.

Lifetime financing is the only option available. Choose but choose wisely.

Civic #1

This car is fresh off the assembly line. It’s interior has that beloved new car smell and still retains the plastic covering the seats and warning tags. The odometer reads 34 km. The distance from factory to loading dock to dealership. It hasn’t been broken in yet and requires delicate driving for the first few hundred kilometres to break the engine in. It’s never been over-revved and fully lubricated. No speck of rust, just pure glistening sheet metal and glossy reflective finish. It’s engine chambers are silky smooth with zero wear, and she turns over without any hesitation. She comes with a leading in-class 10 year warranty, full dealership service and free towing service where unforeseen trouble might arise to get you back on the road to continue your journey unimpeded. You know this car has a low manufactures defect rate, high resale value, great on gas and is low maintenance. This is the most reliable car available when properly maintained.

This car is worth the full dealership price. Worthy of:
Long-Term Financing / Short-Term Leasing / 3 Day Rental

Civic #2

This car is used. It’s only had 2 prior owners. Your used vehicle package shows this to be accurate. The odometer reads 63,576 km. While it may seem like a lot, it’s a fairly good number for a vehicle of this age.  You check the service books and see that both previous owners took very good care of the car and treated it with class and dignity. Regular oil changes, prescribed services done at the recommended intervals. The interior is clean and sparkles with a fresh detailing. It may not have it’s new car smell, but it certainly looks and feels rich and luxurious. No hints of nicks or scratches on the dash or console. The air freshener on the mirror works nicely. The original warranty is nearly expired, but because the car has been properly maintained, the dealer explains he can add on an extended warranty to cover the bare basics after the original one expires. Tow service is available, but must be paid for as an extra. The engine purrs like a kitten with little or no hesitation, and it’s barely lost any of it’s horses since it rolled off the assembly line. Some minor rust is starting to show on the undercarriage and exhaust but the paint is holding well and still shines. The swirl marks in the clear coat are not noticeable until viewed up close. The build quality of this car has held up.

This car is worth the full book value price. Worthy of:
Long-Term Financing / Short-Term Leasing / 3 Day Rental

Civic #3

This car has been ravaged. It’s had 25 previous owners. The used vehicle package is 18 pages long and can’t keep up. Warranty? Pffft. HA. Nice try. It’s gone. The odometer reads 747,937 km. This car has been driven into the ground. This car has seen big city stop and go driving, it’s seen cross country driving, it’s been in drag races, drift competitions and red-lined on so many occasions. It’s had after market parts attached and taken off, it’s so full of holes. It’s body panels are loose, it’s kit skirt package has been stripped off. The service manual was lost, there are no clear maintenance records, no determination whether any maintenance was done at all but a quick look tells you the obvious. The oil filter, fuel injectors and air filters are clogged past their usefulness. Leaks abound under the car, as does an enormous amount of rust and a broken exhaust manifold. The catalytic converter is shot and the tailpipe belches out thick black smoke certain to fail any emissions test. The tires have been balded away and the alignment is off. The gasket is leaking, the piston chamber has been scuffed and scored with metal etchings from dirty oil, the piston rings are shot and the engine has almost zero compression. Most of the horses have left the stable leaving the car severely under-powered and unable to overtake or climb uphill well. The car smells of noxious fumes, cheap cigars, stripper body cream and the remnants of past DNA excretions. The leather seating is ripped and torn, the dash has all sorts of dents, scrapes and cuts, the centre console looks like a war broke out between cigarettes and coffee and cigarettes won. The fabric on the ceiling is sagging, the power options fail to work, the A/C blows hot air and the sunroof lets water into the car when it rains. There is mold growing in the car. There is so much rust, this car may snap in half if it hits a pothole at high speed. This is a beater. A summer car. The car you buy for the scrap yard price to get you through a short spell until you’ve saved up enough for the car you always wanted!

This car is worth below market value. Worthy of:
Long-Term Financing / Short-Term Leasing / 3 Day Rental

Now for the fun part. You have no clue which of those three cars is A, B or C. You simply have to go by what you see right now from the outside of the vehicle. You are not allowed to step inside the car. You are not allowed to go under the car. You are not allowed to pop the hood. You are not allowed to check the odometer. You are not allowed to peer through the windows. You are not allowed to kick the tires. You are not allowed to let your mechanic have a look at it. And you must choose NOW!

Are you willing to pay FULL PRICE for one of those cars that are statistically shown to breakdown, be unreliable and fail to get from point A to point B on a gamble?

So why would you expect any man to take a gamble on.. how should i say this.. delicate sensibilities here.. i’ll just use Dalrock’s words here:

WIFE UP A SLUT!

..

Some might find it horribly objectionable to feel like your sexuality is ‘owned’ by another like a material possession like a car.

too bad

Like it or not, when we’re with you, we own it. As in, it’s ours, and we don’t plan on sharing it because we deem it rather special to us. It’s part of that whole ‘commitment’ thing, whether for a day or a lifetime. Otherwise cheating would be going out of style. How special we treat it depends in large part how special you treated it. If you let men take you for joyrides like a car… just sayin.

“Possession” of a person and their sexuality (and who they share it with) usually doesn’t bother women when we apply it to the idea of a committed relationship to a long term boyfriend or a marriage to a husband. In that case, that ring signifies “Hands off bitch, he’s mine.. i own him and his dick, nyah nyah, his alpha seed is mine! I won, you can take you hypergamous pussy somewhere else. I OWN HIM!” Funny how that works huh.

So distasteful when we say we want to own your sexuality but nothing like you wanting to owning us, men, our fidelity and commitment.

Hmmm. Must consult the Philosoraptor on this.

In any case, no matter how mad you get, a majority of men will agree this is the way it is. It’s how the sexual market place operates. It just so happens to resemble car sales rather well.

..

The only thing this example couldn’t factor for was the *love* factor. Usually a woman will say something stupid like “But it doesn’t matter how much sex she had with how many random partners she had.. as long as she truly loves the one she’s with now, why should her number matter?” Let me explain something to you.

The only person she is going to really *LOVE* is an Alpha (the alpha of her eye may be a beta, but his act is Alpha enough to her). Through and through, no questions asked she will love an Alpha of her eye with all her might because it is in her nature to attempt to earn the love of a top alpha. The problem is that most real Alpha’s with options do not want to settle on the town bike, unless her beauty and genetics are so stunning as to make it worth his while, and he is a natural Alpha, where keeping her is as effortless as breathing. (this is like a mechanic buying a broken down wreck, but he has the tools to restore her)

When a woman says “why should her number matter when she truly loves him?” it is precisely because the majority of men at this point in her life(late) will NOT be natural Alpha’s(they’re snatched up & spoken for), and whatever initial love she is feeling thanks to a chemical concoction of brain juice, once it wears off all she will be left with are comparisons between this lesser man standing in front of her and all the previous romeo’s and throbbing cocks that brought her to that drug addled high she so once enjoyed on the carousel. That new man thrill, repeating the initial love chemistry cocktail over and over. Whatever love she feels right NOW is fleeting. It’s so inevitable you can set your clock to it!

See, the car analogy goes both ways too. Not in terms of mileage, but in terms of what you get for the price you can afford. It’s just that women have less currency to spend as they age, and can’t afford to finance the sporty American muscle car or the European luxury car. They can’t even afford to lease it. They might still be able to rent it for a night. So all she’s got left is enough to finance a domestic people mover.

I’m sorry. When a woman decides to spend her whole life renting and leasing Chargers and Mustangs for quick thrills and joyrides.. the idea of ending up with a Minivan for the rest of her days will never be overcome, no matter how much she might have loved it’s 283hp 3.6L engine and loaded trim features when she test drove it on the lot.

Don’t get me wrong… it’s a great fucking vehicle for a family!

But it’s still just a minivan…

A collection of my comments that spurred me to write this post. (i was high on coffee and yogurt the day i wrote these. pure gold!)

Comment #1

Comment #2

Comment #3

Comment #4

Comment #5

67 comments

  1. You hit it with the chemical stuff. The number indicates how addicted she is to chasing cock. And it’s pretty much inevitable that it will happen again. Boredom with what she has, and chasing after a new thrill.

    Why making long term commitment to someone who is after short term fun?

    You can reverse genders here and women will agree when it’s about committing to a “manwhore”. They see the risk = the number matters. In the case of men though, a high number also proves other stuff, like high performance. And women thrive on the sense of risk and danger that a high status man provides. But hey, the risk is there.

    Thing is men are not attracted to that risk. In this case we attempt to use all the other resources and dominance etc to prevent that risk.


  2. Great post, M3. I’m a little surprised you didn’t mention car #3 being rear-ended on numerous occasions.


  3. Quick points:

    1. I’m almost ashamed to admit it, but I actually think I got tingles while reading your description for Civic #1. Seriously.

    2. I agree with Yohami about the whole whore vs manwhore thing. With STDs these days, I think both sexes should learn to choose more carefully…it’s better for all involved. If I wasn’t with my lover and was scoping around the SMP, I’d turn down ANY guy if he told me he had more than 4 sexual partners or didn’t always use protection/tried to tell me protection isn’t necessary with him.

    Which leads me to my next point of…

    3. After reading through various posts (here and elsewhere), I had a very frank discussion with my lover about the topics thereof. We honestly talked for a little over an hour, and found out some things about each other that we never really covered in detail. He is of the opinion that, while I’d be open to having other sexual partners join us to make him happy, I’m essentially monogamous.

    I think I need to research this more, and see if any nonFeminist psychologists have done studies on women in regards to hypergamy vs monogamy in their relationships. Hmmm…


  4. @Herr_Wilson,

    I thought that was what he alluded to about the exhaust being shot.


  5. New car smell can be toxic, outgas your fresh-off-the-line car as much as possible before driving it a long distance. Also, never forget to encourage regular waxing to keep that a consistently good finish. And always keep the RPMs under the recommended limits until the pistons/rings are broken in, or else you might have some repair work later. You should also probably wait until you’ve driven it 5000 to 8000 miles before putting anything after-market on it, no matter what encouragement is offered.

    [M3: I think you meant to say "New car smell can be IN-toxic-CATING" no?]


  6. “Wreckage? Salvage? What are these words? Sorcery and Witchcraft?”

    Hah. Nice.

    You wanted to be a comic book artist or graphic designer when you were in high school, didn’t you? Than again, for all I know, that could be what you do now…


  7. Funny breakdown. Not a perfect analogy, but I sure do like that regular waxing is an important thing in taking care of any car’s/woman’s finish!


  8. My take on finding which one is Civic A, B, C … let them start the engine, put the pedal down and listen to the sounds.

    So let the chicks speak and listen to their words. More often than not they will tell you all you need to know and with your recently acquired red pill car-buying wisdom you’ll be able to go over the shiny looks and focus on the durability of the engine


  9. By the way, girls picking alphas act the same way as girl buying cars. Never seen girls everywhere buying the same models over and over again?

    Here in Europe 8/10 people driving a mini are girls. 9/10 girls get wet at the thought of the same cars. They buy them in a completely irrational decision: because of the color, the extras and other nonsenses. Sounds familiar?


  10. A woman’s SMV is often like a car’s dollar value. The older it is…the more it goes down in resale.


  11. I recommend observing the “car” under black lights too, for signs of visible blots indicative of a steady stream of “health code violations”.

    BTW…you look so much nicer without those glasses and skull cap!


  12. While I like comparing girls to cars as much as anyone But if girls were your intended audience, it has been my experience that their minds turn off at the word “car.”

    One point that you missed was that we should be much picker with potential wives. A mistake on a car is nothing compared to the wrong wife.


  13. Another bit of science (from a horrible fucking piece to read)

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2212493/Id-mop-floor-sex-husband-Why-Brits-sex-just-chore.html#axzz2K5gxEKCi

    *Paula Hall, sex and relationship psychotherapist for Relate and author of Improving Your Relationship For Dummies, says it can partly be blamed on biology.

    ‘When we first get together with somebody we’re producing PEA [phenylethylamine] — the chemical responsible for lust, fluttery stomachs and the fact we can’t keep our hands off each other,’ she explains.

    ‘Unfortunately, that wears off after 18 months, which is the time in which evolution reckons you should get pregnant.
    ‘After that, we’re producing oxytocin — a bonding chemical — which is all about keeping us together. Nobody, after a decade of marriage, feels huge amounts of lust for their partner — especially women, who have around 40 per cent less testosterone than men. They have to work harder to keep their sex drive going.*

    What’s a crack addict want more than the joy of sobriety?

    Crack.


  14. @M3,

    Maybe that explains why they lose the ability to bond. They have become addicted to the casual sex and the PEA produced and so the oxytocin simply isn’t enough.

    Which does suggest an interesting experiment.

    Assuming the above data and hypothesis is correct, then even women who don’t actually slut it up, but flit from boyfriend to boyfriend will also suffer from the diminished bonding effect. So even a chaste girl who goes through a lot of boyfriends is going to wind up damaged goods.


  15. @M3,

    Whoops, forgot to say, which runs counter to the expectations on that score. I wonder how it would be possible to do the experiment.

    It might explain the depressingly high divorce rate in christian circles (assuming the girls are being chaste) even when the men are marrying virgins. Obviously not the only cause (more than enough of that to go around) but it might be an interesting contributing factor.


  16. 3rdmilleniummen.wordpress.com/2012/12/01/manosphere-virginity-part-2/

    Yet another post from you going in my next Best of the Manosphere on Virginity vs Sluttery!!


  17. Minivans are the shit. Have you seen the features on the new Honda Odyssey? Swoon. Mind you, I’ve never really driven a sports car, so lack of twin turbo doesn’t keep me up at night.

    Wait… we’re talking about actual, IRL cars, right? No? Haha, yeah, points still hold.

    I bet you can learn quite a bit about a woman by asking her about her favorite cars, why she likes them, etc., etc.


  18. M3, from the article: ” Nobody, after a decade of marriage, feels huge amounts of lust for their partner”

    The above is a huge load of poo. I’m as attracted/”lustful” of my husband as I ever was…probably more than ever, and I’ve been married longer than that.


  19. Liz, you married an alpha, his ability to remain attractive and push your magic buttons are what keep you in lust. Most beta men cannot generate the same, thus the marriage fails into dulldrums where the man rests on his laurels safe in the guarantee of marriage, and the women feel trapped in a marriage that is tortuous.. Especially if they have multiple 5 minutes of alpha from the past to compare it too in their minds.

    You appear to be in the minority that got the hubby you look up to, idealise, adore and respect. Hence he remains 100% bone-able in your eyes. (The alpha of your eye)


  20. @M3

    What a depressing piece.
    It also doesn’t apply to all types of relationships…though yes, I do admit that mine is not the norm.

    “They (women) have to work harder to keep their sex life going”. Ummm, why?

    It’s SEX! Sex is like the most addictive activity on the planet…it releases a chemical soup into your brain that drug dealers would give their right arm for. As soon as you’ve “had” it, you can’t help thinking about/planning the next time you can have it again. I mean, I just THINK about sex hundreds of times a day…it gets very distracting sometimes, and I’m very glad I’m not a guy, lol. Unless these women have a man who just lies there like a dead fish, I don’t know how they have to “struggle” to want sex.

    “Inconceivable!”


  21. Dearest Anna,

    “It’s SEX! Sex is like the most addictive activity on the planet”

    Only with the person you lust after. And if you’re in a relationship where you husband is ‘meh’.. your drive (desire) to boff him goes away. His drive will *always* be there because he’s a man, and if you have a decent figure, his dick always rises. Yours has to be stoked, desire has to be nurtured for a woman otherwise it becomes a chore. If the guy you’re banging right now was your husband, not a side-dish.. and you both had chores and responsibilities and kids and bills and dinner and cleaning and chores.. through all of that he will still get a hard-on for you despite the world coming to an end.

    But you may have different thoughts at that point. Especially if he’s a supplicating herb and not a man you look up, revere or respect, and feel that the only reason you’re going to lie back and think of england is because it’s part of the contract you signed way back when he put a ring on it.

    You keep looking at this from your point of view. The article is talking about millions of women married to beta schlubbs they find zero attraction to, but are married thus must perform the obligation sex marriage demands of couples.

    That kind of sex is zero fun.


  22. Ha, I like the metaphor you used here a lot. Never thought about it that way.

    To continue the metaphor even further it would be like a busted up car on the outside but to be told ‘its whats inside that counts!’

    Too bad whats on the inside is a used up interior thats seen a strange amount of action and even the engine is getting up there in the years.


  23. @M3

    You’re right, and I do have some trouble with this since I already am not feminine. I can only make informed comments about what *I* know, not what I think other people go through. Be that as it may, I’d never be with someone I didn’t respect…whether we’re talking about marriage or what I have now.

    But I recently spent an entire week with my lover. We had sex every night, even though both of us were tired, both of us had to be on the phone, talk to relatives, transfer money for bills, and have meetings with our separate vendors. When we were done the first day, we were both operating on 4 hours of sleep. It didn’t matter, and the sex (while different) was just as good the first night as it was the last.

    Now, I realize that this was only 1 week, and that the rest of “normal” life didn’t get in the way. But after nearly 7 years, I still lust for him just as much. I mean, it’s partially him and his personality of course…but it’s also just wanting his body. If a couple has been married for 15 years, and are both in good/fit shape, I guess I just can’t comprehend a woman NOT getting aroused at the sight of her man’s naked body, especially if he’s aroused to. Shouldn’t there be feelings of “Wow, he really wants me” or “Yes, I want to pleasure this man of mine” to stoke the feminine fires?


  24. Anna, lots of women dont have that ardent lust for their husbands even when they get married. They marry for reasons other than lust. They settle down. The sex drive goes down too.

    If you were to marry your guy and he stopped having sex with other girls and you saw each other every day and added in some monotony, chaos and life in the mix, over time the sex drive would go down too. Unless you and him do something about it, something intentional.

    What do couples do about it? they do nothing, or, the wife takes charge in denying sex and making him do chores instead and punish him like he was a boy, and the guy adapts by pushing less for sex or looking for it elsewhere.


  25. M3: “Alpha of my eye”. I like it! :-)


  26. @Yohami

    Yes, I know about that…

    I guess my real question is WHY do couples not do anything about it? If you’re in your 15th year of marriage, and you’re not having sex as often as you’d want/need, why not admit the problem and fix it?

    Schedule a date night.
    Leave the kids at grandma & grandpa’s once a month.
    Hire a sitter and get a hotel room.
    Take a mini vacation just for you twice a year.
    Take advantage of when your kids are at sleepovers or summer camp.
    Have a quickie once a week in the shower.
    Send naughty pics/texts to each other at work. Caress each other when it’s late at night and you’re watching a movie on the couch.
    Hell, watch some porn or read a dirty novel together. Anything!

    Even if you don’t get to have a full fledged 3 hour sexual marathon every month, just take the time to let each other know that you care about your sex life. Keep the embers hot so the fire is easy to stoke when the time is right!


  27. Anna, most people dont “do” anything about anything. They go with the flow, taking whatever life throws at them, and quitting or evading when it becomes unbearable. To actively do stuff about stuff and change intentionally requires energy and focus to go through pain. Not an abundant quality.

    The lack of sex in most marriages is not about scheduling, it’s about lack of lust, which is the result of the kind of people they have become.


  28. “3 hour sexual marathon” is not a marathon


  29. I agree that if the guy stays in shape, the woman will always ludt after him. That was the case with every girl I’ve been with, including my ex wife. I’ve been with my current girl for about to years and when I come in from work and pull my shirt off, she still cannot keep her hands off me. I think men lose the lust for a partnet faster than women. Or maybe just Alpha men do. I start getting bored with one chick pretty fast, no matter how hot she is.


  30. If my husband didn’t lust after me too, I’m sure I’d lose interest also, Dr I.

    I don’t know how anyone could stay hot for someone who lacks an interest. Feeling desired has an impact on desire.


  31. And remember, a new car drops in resale value from the moment you drive it off the lot…


  32. Liz, I still lust after my girl. I just don’t get hard every time she walks into a room anymore. That’s my idea of interest level dropping. I think it’s normal for men to get used to their mate. That’s why some lingerie or dressing up for a date is a good idea. Trick our brains, send us back into overdrive. It’s finally bikini weather here, and she’s back to having my full attentio..


  33. Hm. I think I might just buy a bicycle, much less bother to maintain :-)


  34. Oh, Yeah! That’s good to hear. :-)
    I always thought that’s why women are usually a bit on the crazy side. To keep men guessing and feeling almost like they are having a piece of strange from time to time so they don’t get bored.

    As long as it’s crazy fun, not…um…crazy crazy/psycho type crazy. Too much of the latter is an unfortunate, inadvertent bottleneck evolutionary bait and switch!


  35. Funny Cakes and Shakes girl…


  36. @Yohami

    Lol, then how long is a “sexual marathon” session to you? Given that 99.9% of men are not multi orgasmic (at least not comparable to women), how much longer could a guy go?

    As for your other point…that’s just sad. I don’t get how a couple can just say “you know, we haven’t tried to fix anything about our relationship, so we’ll just end it.” If one of the partners simply refuses to admit there’s an issue, or if there’s actual abuse going on…I guess that’s one thing. But if it’s due to simple laziness on both sides, I don’t know if I have any sympathy.

    Again, I’ve never been in that type of relationship. This is just my opinion based on failed marriages I’ve been close to in my life thusfar. I don’t have any real experience.


  37. marathon for me is when I bang the girl most of the night, taking naps, then wake up and keep fucking, take naps and chat and stuff, then keep fucking, then wtf it’s night again, then we go out and dinner, then go back and fuck

    so more like 20+ hours


  38. @ Yohami

    You Sir, are an animal.

    I tried that once.

    Couldn’t do it.

    Wife couldn’t keep up. :)


  39. @Yohami

    Ah, understood sir.
    So you’re talking about making it into a whole day thing…I was talking about a single session of uninterrupted fun time.
    Either way sounds great, honestly. :D


  40. You have some mad photoshopping skills.


  41. Says Liz: “BTW…you look so much nicer without those glasses and skull cap!”

    Yes. So nice he couldn’t get sex for twelve years. All the while being told by women that he shouldn’t try to change. Now that he has changed, a woman says…


  42. Lets see, I’ve owned 2 cars in my life. Car 1- 2 year old civic owned by woman that drive to and from work, garage kept. Katrina killed it in 2005, bought it in 1994.

    Replaced with 2006 Acura Rsx-X type. Odo read 50. In Japan it a Honda Type-R. It has only 65,000 miles, and it 5 years old….not too shabby.

    I’ve had more than one 30 something yo woman give me ahit about only messing with women in the early 20’s. I always tell them it’s because their box still has that new car smell.

    Lulzrcoaster


  43. I forgot to leave this ‘lil nugget’o wisdom.

    In keeping with the metaphor of this post- I have no intention of ever owning another car. Ever. It’s much better for me to lease a vehicle than own one.

    It’s cheaper and IF I decide I want a different car, there really are no consequences. If I buy a car and need to get rid of it, I WILL NOT get what I paid for it. the longer I own it, the less I get back.

    Lease baby, lease. I can lease dependable and save a ton, and if I want bad-ass car. Sure, it’ll cost a bit more, but maybe I wanna show off.

    He’ll I can even lease. FLEET of cars. He’ll, I’m already leasing 3 here in NO and 2 in Jax.

    Zoom zoom zoom.


  44. Holy Shit Mr. M3, did you just doxx yourself???

    here’s a cheap laugh…

    http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3sw0c8/


  45. as far as lease/own…

    is that prostitution?

    paging Advocatus Diaboli…


  46. After I bought my car (new) it took me two weeks to figure out how to work the windows.

    Turns out the button was in the middle.


  47. STB-
    “as far as lease/own…

    is that prostitution?”

    are you asking me or M3?

    and as far as this line-
    ” He’ll I can even lease. FLEET of cars. H’ell, I’m already leasing 3 here in NO and 2 in Jax.”

    Hell I can even lease a FLEET of cars. Hell, I’m already leasing 3 here in NO and 2 in Jax.

    dear autocorrect on the iPhone- suck death and die.


  48. @ Stonerw/aBoner

    Finance to Own = marriage
    Leasing = Mini relationship LTR
    Renting = STR / FWB
    Joyriding = ONS

    It has often been said marriage is a form of prostitution. I did the math a while back regarding what i paid out in my separation plus all the debts i paid off for her. All that money could have got me a $60 blowjob for 666 straight days (funny number huh?) Spaced out properly i could have a blowjob every week for life.


  49. Hehe.. i’m glad the make fun of feminism meme is catching on.

    Next one on the list.

    “I need feminism because when people call me a misogynist and say i hate women, i need to be able to point at the actual problem and say “no no no, i love women.. i hate FEMINISTS!” because they’re not actually women.”


  50. @ JustPassing

    “All the while being told by women that he shouldn’t try to change.”

    I’ll never forget my internal reaction when i noticed how my ex fwb enjoyed touching my arms and asking me to flex and making little growly noises. The same woman who years earlier told me not to change, that i was awesome as i was, that attraction was more than just looks…. and while she might have had a point about the attraction being more than looks, she did me no favors by encouraging me to stay the same. Looks are huge importance for *initial* attraction.

    Huge disqualifier in today’s age of instant self gratification women.


  51. @ Carolina

    You like my greaser car salesman look eh ;)


  52. If it floats, flies or fornicates lease it…………………………


  53. Oh, yeah. LOL

    But we need to see more shots of you shirtless. :)

    Let’s have an entire blog filled with them, just one after the other. “For the Ladies.”


  54. [...] pool dry up, men get older and find they have almost infinite options with VERY attractive women. M3 has an interesting metaphor along the lines of what i’m talking about. sorry i don’t [...]


  55. The first photo looks scarily like Mickey Rourke.


  56. Once with an experianced slut after it was over and we were laying there, I thought I’d be nice and cuddle, she then said ‘dont, our brain is releasing chemicals and I dont want to become attached to you.’

    Hahah, too bad she wasn’t hotter.


  57. The pictures alone are lulz.


  58. Dug this up. Related and funny as fuck:

    http://urbanlegends.about.com/od/sex/a/gold_digger.htm


  59. Oh my god, that is frickin’ AWESOME!

    “I make good arm candy, marry me!”
    Dear lord, what a horrible mating call…must be from the not-at-all endangered sluttitus entitlemus, or perhaps the pretti pussicus.

    So, she is intelligent, sophisticated, drop dead gorgeous, kinda young, and will work hard to make a good hearth and home?

    Yeah, ok. If you’re husband make THAT much money…you’ll want maids. I doubt miss princess would do any home/hearth making of her own. Yes, her looks will fade…and with the lazy/partying lifestyle she probably wants, it will greatly accelerate. Youth and looks…well, he already nailed THAT into place in his response. Intellectual and sophisticated? Could be, but probably not…if that’s the case, she really should go get her own job and amaze her employers to grab those high pay promotions.

    Yup, whole thing is most likely fake. But it’s hella funny!


  60. Thanks for that old Craig’s list post m3, that brightened my morning up.

    It was humorous, but also extremely reasonable as a reply on the whole. It could be fake, but it would seem the advice is extremely reasonable and rational and does answer the question and attitude honestly.

    I do particularly like the part where he says, if my money disappeared so would you. That is where the rubber really meets the road. I do like that he basically comes out and says pint blank, you bring nothing of value to a long term relationship that cannot be had much more cheaply.


  61. Although the email is mst likely a fake I would wager there were a number of girls who wished they had been brave enough to ask the question because they were pursuing exactly that strategy.


  62. Related: talks about the bio mechanical implications of ‘love’ and not being prepared in this day and age when the juice wears off.


  63. Yet another reason why I don’t think homo sapiens are meant to be monogamous…not truly. I mean, look at our closest relatives, the bonobo chimpanzees. I have seen numerous polyamorous (not polygamous) relationships that actually work out well for all involved.

    The human concept of entitlement and jealousy is, I think, what it boils down to.
    Thoughts, anyone?


  64. I think that concealed ovulation and lack of estrus which are unique with respect to humans when compared to other primates (as I understand it) would indicate humans are more naturally a monogamous species than the chimp.
    That said, of course my husband would love a harem. Not happening.


  65. @Liz

    This would normally be true, but I was really just talking about the Bonobos, or diminutive chimpanzee (which are very different from “common” chimps).

    Not only does this species eat the least amount of meat than nearly any other higher primate, but they have a lifespan nearly that of a human (45-65 yrs), form extremely social community groups, have self awareness when shown a mirror, can learn more sign language than gorillas, and engage in face to face copulation (which was formerly considered unique to humans).

    But I was always more interested in how non violent they are compared even to us, and how they use pleasure/sex outside of reproduction aka to resolve conflicts, relieve tension, apologize, strengthen the bonds of the social group. I actually did a paper comparing aggression in bonobos relative to humans for a college class…with attention to the fact that polyamory is in both species, but frowned upon in our society.

    Here’s one of the sources I’d used, though mine was actually from the issue of Scientific American. Even if you only skim it, the findings are totally worth the read. http://www.primates.com/bonobos/bonobosexsoc.html


  66. Increase the size of the typeface to ~13px, the width of the page to like 820+, and get an editor to make your posts shorter.

    This post is just f**king 40% fluff.

    Your comments on CH are usually great, but here you come off as an idiot who thinks he’s as smart as Roissy.

    And learn to use some damn line-breaks; Son!

    [M3: Thanks for the kind critique lol. Will keep it under advisement. Line break? What's a line break?]


  67. This post is greatness. :)



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