Why oh why should i bother to try for an LTR?July 20, 2012
I just had a very interesting time exchanging with Cooper, Rich.Aubrey and Susan over at HUS stemming from a comment Cooper made in the thread Misery in the Friend Zone.
It was a comment so absolutely touching as it hit on all the latent beta in me that yearns to FEEL like there must be something more in this SMP than a simple algorithm or chess like strategy of using evolutionary excuses to justify certain behaviors while still asking for civilized action and chivalrous attitudes in an era that clearly shows they have outlived their usefulness. Without the ability to put the genie back in the bottle, can we ever get to a point where ‘love‘ actually means something tangible and concrete, rather than a ‘feeling’ that burns out as fast as it starts and becomes as dark and cold as the remnants of a Sun the burns out and dies?
But it all started in another thread that took on a life of it’s own.. regarding the Sexual Selection Theory.
After having read (and agreed with) Ted D[link], Esco[link] and MikeC’s[link] revulsion towards woman’s attitudes (or films portrayal of, take your pick, life imitating art imitating life i suppose) regarding a newly wedded woman’s ability to rationalize sleeping with an apex alpha that is not her husband in the following terms [off of Susan's comment in response to user Passer_By; emphasis mine]
- Susan Walsh July 19, 2012 at 9:59 am
I’ll give you a couple minutes to digest that one for a moment.
Sunk in yet?
Betrothed. Wedded Bliss. Hot Alpha walks by. MY LIFE IS OVER, I WILL REGRET THIS FOREVER!
Please kill me.
Ted followed it up all those exchanges with a killer line here:
Isn’t the whole point of wearing a wedding ring to remind you about this, and to tell everyone else you are off limits?
I was recently at a wedding to a friend of mine. It was at a Baptist church, not a Roman Catholic like i went through. It was similar but there were notable exceptions. The vows sounded a little different. Plus the Pastor(not Priest) was VERY explicit about the meaning behind the rings each partner gives the other, about the commitment it symbolized, about it being there to REMIND you that you are now connected, one flesh. He used a word, I believe it was troth but i can’t recall, that connoted the very essence of commitment. I heard the word commitment so many times, and their service was half the length of the one i went through. They take their shit seriously with regards to FUCKING COMMITMENT!!!
Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
6 But from the beginning of creation God[a] made them male and female. [b]
7 For this reason a man will leave
his father and mother
[and be joined to his wife],[c]
8 and the two will become one flesh. [d]
So they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, man must not separate.”
[I hope you appreciate this, i'm digging up a lot of stuff that could cause me to spontaneously combust right now]
So you can see a row has already developed based on the apparent inability of women to grasp the severity of the meaning of commitment. As Cooper so deftly pointed out… modern women today treat wedding vows like a ‘mood‘, and not a legally binding pact that it is before their chosen deity.
Truly Christ is weeping!
One wonders how well they do when they try to explain to the phone company why they shouldn’t pay the ETF fees for terminating their contracts because they want the shiny red phone that the other wireless carrier sells.
So now we get to the Friendzone thread and Danny opens up with a comment on tips for breaking out of or converting a friendzone into a romancezone:[emphasis always mine from here on]
dannyfrom504July 19, 2012 at 1:29 am
i’ve been on more than one date where the girls said afterwards she wasn’t “feeling it” but she’d love to see me again.
my response- “no, no point in that. apparently i’m looking for a romantic partner, and you’re looking for a sucker. it was fun, ni-night.”
i’ve actually had women escalate after doing that.
Susan replied immediatly with:
I have witnessed girls going from “I don’t want to see his penis!” to “I want to hook up with him” based on nothing more than a well played response to LJBF.
Which had Cooper shaking his head at 101, and poor Richard Aubrey completely mortified and in disbelief at 103:
Richard Aubrey July 19, 2012 at 2:25 pm
… “”I have witnessed girls going from “I don’t want to see his penis!” to “I want to hook up with him” based on nothing more than a well played response to LJBF.””
This has to be a joke. Please? In my world, women are NOT THAT DUMB.
Richard.. i wan’t to live in your world. But sadly, that world can only be accessed by using the Tesseract, and we all know there’s nothing but trouble awaiting you when you play with that thing.
Susan quickly answers the call to explain to Richard that yes.. women are NOT THAT DUMB!
This is how it goes:
Guy is supplicating, eager and devoted. Every action towards his beloved kills the tingle. She LJBFs him. He says, “I’m outta here” and starts hanging out with other people, including some girls. Beloved finds herself piqued that Guy is not paying attention to her. Guy says, “I’m done being your bitch. Fuck off.” Beloved tingles like mad.
Of course, this is dependent on Guy being able to go balls to the wall and be a hardass. If he can do it, his odds are probably 50/50.
After hearing that rousing defense of women’s intelligence Richard quips:
Susan. In your world, women are that dumb. Too bad. If it works, jeez it’s awful to contemplate.
Who am i to argue :)
Now in my best “V” voice..
It is at this point in our story that along comes a idealist: He is a man seemingly with an enormous conscience for whom the ends do not always justify the means, and it is he who suggests that the target of hypergamy is not simply an enemy of the BETA, but rather of LOVE itself.
I will put Cooper’s entire comment up here because his words that he wrote are the words i struggled to find on my own for over 15 years, unable to seize them from my thoughts and put pen to paper. His ‘rant’ if you will, describes so eloquently the fence i currently occupy, unable to determine my next move forward in this forever damaged SMP.
- Cooper July 19, 2012 at 9:02 pm
In my heart, i believe what i truly looked for as a beta is forever gone. An illusion that day by day, article by article, admission by admission by women that the 30 year long beta poisoning my system suffered in believing that real love existed… NEVER REALLY EXISTED! In it’s place we see more and more women regressing into their natural states.
And each time i see or read these things, look back to my own wondeful experience with the exwife who just ‘quit’ on me, our marriage, our life together, have MANY stories of women leaving, divorcing, dumping men in my immediate family back in Poland, my brother being let go, and cheated on, and not finding ONE instance of a man leaving a woman within that same sample pool. If i expand the pool to friends, the numbers become staggering in terms of women leaving men. I can only note of 1 man leaving a woman, but in that case.. it was MUTUAL.
The story of the man trading up his old and aging wife is more Urban Legend than reality. The only place you’ll find that happen frequently is in Hollywood and celebrity. There they have the money, resources and lawyers to deal with such messy breaks in a minimum of time. One even wonders why Hollywood types bother anymore.. it’s almost like a ritual they have to perform to stay in the spotlight. Oh my star power is waning? Time for a divorce and put me back in the headlines. Out in the real world.. it’s women kicking men to the curb at a 2 to 1 clip because most men know the shit storm they’re up against if they try to divorce. I would surmise the 1/3rd of men who do initiate are often choosing the lesser of two evils. Fight it out in divorce court or watch her hate you, make your life hell and fuck around on you while you sleep on the couch as she refuses to start divorce proceedings because living in the home without any disruption works just fine. It’s a wonder why more men don’t shoot themselves more often. Ohhh wait….
So i ask again.. why should i bother trying for an LTR? Perhaps the Nihilists and the Hedonists are right? You can’t fight what human nature is… so come to the dark side and join us in a pussy slaying poon fest!
I don’t know if i’m there yet.. but every day takes me closer to seeing that women only ever look out for number one. THEY DON’T EVEN DENY IT ANYMORE.
And you can’t have true love if you put yourself before your partner.
And if that’s the case, then i guess true love doesn’t exist. How can it if one half of the population is incapable of superseding their chro-mag tendencies to jump ship if the right ship comes sailing by?
I think i’ll sit on the fence for just a bit longer and ponder. I have the luxury since i’m going my own way.
I hope you all enjoyed this little ramble because i just realised it’s 1:21am and i gotta get up for work. Bah.
I just stayed up all night to write this shite. That shit be kray.. fish filet. Now let the sleep take me away.